There are many different social situations that require your child to deploy their manners. There are table manners, manners for home, manners for school, and manners for guests. It can seem difficult and overwhelming to parse all of these different sets of manners and come up with a group of the most important manners.
If you do not, however, you might find yourself with no place to start when it comes to teaching your child manners.
Ultimately, teaching a young child about manners is about teaching them to have respect and empathy for others and to communicate well. Though there is no particular order to it, we have put together a list of some of the most important manners in our opinion. They include:
- Please and Thank You (also Excuse Me). This is one of the first and simplest rules that you can teach your child when it comes to manners, and there are few situations that are not eased by the judicious application of these magic words.
- Proper Forms of Address. Teaching your child to address the adults in their lives respectfully will help them to remember to treat those adults respectfully. It will also start any new relationships off on a good foot.
- Hello, Goodbye. When someone addresses you, it is polite to acknowledge them and respond. Teaching your child to say hello when someone greets them is one way to begin helping them to form that habit.
- Friendliness and Kindness to Others (The Golden Rule). The golden rule is all about empathy. That makes it one of the first rules that you should teach your child. It will help them to make friends and navigate social situations well.
- Cover Your Mouth. Respecting the health of the people around you when you cough, sneeze, or yawn is not only a matter of politeness, it is a matter of safety.
- Good Grooming. This shows that your child has respect for themselves and others and will help to smooth social situations.
- Accept Compliments Graciously. It's something some of us never learn to do correctly, so you may as well teach your child as early as possible.
- Help Others. This relates back to the golden rule, but we don't think it's redundant. Your child should be encouraged to help when and where they can.
- Interruptions. Teach your child not to interrupt unless they have something extremely important to say. Remember to help them navigate the loophole, otherwise you might find yourself wishing you had. Set a good example by not interrupting people, including your child, yourself.
- Follow the Rules. This rule is basic, but imperative. Respect for authority is just as much about manners as it is about safety, and your child should be aware of that. It will allow them to disagree with the rules while still providing them with a reason for following them.
- Sharing is Caring. Your child may already need to share things with others if they have siblings, but if not you need to teach them how to share appropriately. Teach them that it's okay to have some things they won't share, but other items do need to be shared.
- What Not to Share. Over-sharing can be a problem, especially with young children that haven't developed a filter yet. Teach your child that certain topics are not appropriate to discuss with anyone outside of their family or close friends.
- Play Nicely. Having good manners while playing with other children will help your child make good friends. Teach them to let others have a turn, avoid getting too rowdy while playing, and be respectful of toys that they borrow.
- Be Patient. Patience can be hard, especially for younger children. Help your child understand that some things need to be waited for. Practice patience at good opportunities, like waiting for dinner to be served.
- Respect for Nature. This is a set of manners that some parents forget about! Respecting nature is important. Teach your child the concept of “leave no trace” and instill in them the importance of never littering. Help them understand why they shouldn't touch wild animals or disturb their homes.
These manners rules will help you get your child off to a good start when it comes to etiquette, but don't feel that the list is something that should be carved in stone. Instead, feel free to make your own additions and subtractions as needed.